Every year on January 1st, we look in the mirror with a resolve to be different than we were last year. A lot of times we set goals and lists of the things we want to be. Some years we follow through; other years our fears stop us before we even get a chance to begin. Not so much because we don’t want to be better, but more...afraid we might fail, or—even worse—we are scared we might actually succeed. We think: Who am I to be healthy? Who am I to be successful? What right to do I have to spend an entire year bettering myself when so many others need me? How could I possibly say no to that? How could I be strong enough to stand up for myself? Who am I to be organized?—I am just an overwhelmed person.
Beliefs can change the way we see ourselves. Beliefs can stem clear back from our ancestors—trickling down through decades of patterns; or beliefs can cling to us after a life event shows us evidence of its “importance” in our minds.
Wherever they come from, beliefs can hold us back in ways we can’t even see. Threatening us to fail...and mocking us if we try to succeed.
So what do you want this year? Who do you want to become? You might have to start by asking yourself what beliefs are in play right now that will stop you from those goals? We are all really good at making lists of things we want ourselves—or others—to do better. We are all great at talking about change, but until we understand why we are the way that we are...most of the time we will find ourselves wishing for the same change year after year, never understanding why we can’t succeed.
Fear. Where did you come from?
Do you find yourself looking in the mirror and thinking, “my mother was right...I would be more lovable if I could just lose some weight?” Or “Just like my dad...I will never be good at ...” Do your fears and insecurities come from years of training—watching others you look up to hold themselves back...or are they originals you created in your own mind to “protect” yourself from humiliation and failure?
Look into that mirror again. What do you see? Your fears might tell you that you see a person struggling, a person unworthy, a person broken. You might see all you didn’t like about your mother or father—things you said you never wanted to become. You might see flaws and cracks—someone to hate.
Look into the mirror one more time. Look a little deeper. What do your truths say? If you could erase all the lies—the ones you carry deep, the ones you think are so invisible and covered, the ones that have played for generations, the ones that you have spent a life time gathering—who would you be then? If you didn’t hear your haters voices echo inside of you, or the dude in your head telling you of all that you are not...what would be left? You know what it would be? An amazing, beautiful, worthy child of God. That is your truth.
Without fears and insecurities and blocks about who we think we are—or who we are afraid others believe us to be—we find our true selves. Not broken people who write lists or goals of an ideal version of what we never truly believe we can become. Without the lies...all that is left is the truth. Without the lies...we find—who we were always meant to be.
Your life has been tough. That is for sure. Warriors are the ones who survive the hard stuff—not losers. Your story didn’t break you....or else you would not still be here. You have walked through the heaviest parts with grace because you are strong. So start believing it. Live that truth and tell the fear it is time to go. You know the only thing that has ever held you back...is you. So write the list this year armed with truth. Set goals—not out of fear of who you think you have to be, but—with faith that you will just remember who you are.
-I love this phase when babies start to find themselves in the mirror, though the twins never got too excited because they basically had a mirror in front of them at all times! 😂 Happy New Year friends. Thanks for being here and always supporting us! We love you.
Great post.
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